Deep Thought: Friendship

Do you have friends? Hopefully you do, but if not then email me and I'll be your friend. Friendship is a vital piece of our social life, in fact it is majority of it in most cases. But what makes a friend, or more importantly a GOOD friend? To me, a friend is someone you can rely on near 100% percent for anything you'd need. Someone no matter what the situation they can help, or try within the extent of their power to help. A person from which you can get another point of view on situations, yet know that they will always be in your best interest. A person that can set things into perspective and reel you in when your feelings are crazy. But if that's what makes a friend what about the people you associate with that don't fit that but you talk to? They are...associates. The word friend is thrown around casually in society nowadays because it makes people feel good to have a "friend". To say "You're my friend" sounds warmer and more inviting than saying "You're my associate", and that's just the nature of the words. I see friendship as a whole like a pyramid. At the tip you have the penultimate, the best friend. To me that's a person that if need be could step into your life and essentially become you for sake of any argument. If someone is planning something surprise for you, they know that the best friend will know what to do. A friend is just below, and not saying they wouldn't know you well, they just aren't on the same level, be it because of time known or other outlying circumstances. the difference between friend and best friend may even be the reliability of being a friend, but that comes in later. An associate to me is someone you can get along with in set intervals, enough to not dredge your interactions. Most "friends" people have fit in this category. Y'see the things with me and my friends is this. I don't have too much of a family influence to run to, so I rely on my friends to either distract me from it, or to vent, rant or otherwise go verbally crazy. I guess this has made me put more pressure on who I call 'friend' so I don't go blurting on someone I can't trust or someone who I know won't care. But as I thought deeper about relationships in general I realized that the scheme I follow can apply to a lot of people. Think on your friends. You probably have 1-3 that you can tell anything, do anything with and otherwise can always be around, your best friend. Most people's best friends are similar to how I see them. But the discrepancy seems to be between "friend" and "other". See I have 2 best friends, and about 8 friends, and tons of "other". Not to discount the "others" but there's is some outlying flaw that I either can't deal with or prevents them from elevating. Think about your friends. Do any of them have one big flaw that at some point you can't stand them for? What is it that keeps them a friend if at some point you can't stand their presence? Why is it that they are only friends for part of the time you are with them, and the rest they aren't? Don't get me wrong I'm simply cross examining my beliefs with your the reader's and trying to broaden both of our outlooks. I feel like I am too hard on good people who want to be closer to me, but my subconscious rejects them because they don't fit a mold. I sound like a cruel hearted egotist right now I know, but I hold my friends in high regard, but on occasion I question myself on why I only associate with some people and befriend others. Where is the line drawn and is it possible to change it without collapsing everything I know now of friendship? I think that if we evaluate within ourselves what we want in other that the people we socialize with will dictate whether they are "worthy" of higher status in our everyday lives. If we somehow present outward what we want to receive inwards then the people around us will...fill in the blanks on their own so to speak. Personally I like my group of friends and associates, for me right now in my life it is now balanced. I am still actively pruning and planting new seeds in a perpetual change of people to hopefully keep from making a wrong decision on people, but now I feel like I don't have to be a lone farmer, but I have a little help from my surrounding to help the fruits of my harbor.

P.S. You don't know how many times i spelled 'friend' as 'firend'. Damn my dyslexia.